Beware of the Well-Meaning Advice Other Parents Give You

The Sonlight® Forums are a wonderful resource where you can meet other homeschooling parents and learn from their successes and failures. We encourage you to visit the forums and take advantage of the feedback you can get for any questions you may have.

At the same time, we ALSO encourage you to measure the feedback you receive and filter it through your own circumstances and experience.

One of the benefits of the Sonlight forums is that you receive help to make better decisions concerning your children's education. All too often, though, you may feel constrained by the advice you receive. You might feel as if you have to take other parents' recommendations.

I want to assure you: YOU are the one best equipped to make decisions regarding your children's education. YOU know them best — and you know what's best for them.

Here's a classic example of something that has happened on the Sonlight forums and is likely to happen again... (All offered with the best of intentions)

A mom new to homeschooling asks what level would be good for her 7-year-old son. She mentions that she's thinking about Core B because her son hasn't really studied World History yet.

Another veteran homeschooler sees the question and replies: "I'd never choose Core B. That'd be way too easy! When my son was 7 we did Core D."

Because of the advice, the mom new to homeschooling feels constrained to go with Core D because she doubts her own decision to go with Core B. After all, she's never homeschooled before and the other lady has been homeschooling for a number of years. What to do?

In this situation it's easy to place too much importance on the homeschooling veteran's advice. To help you weigh the advice and its value to your situation, ask yourself these questions:

  1. Who gave me the advice?
  2. Is this parent's son or daughter excelling? Average? "Learning delayed"?
  3. Is my son or daughter excelling? Average? "Learning delayed"?
  4. Does this parent have the same philosophy of education that I do? (For instance, do you believe it's important to give your child achievable or challenging learning goals.)

We recommend you always keep these questions in the back of your mind as you weigh the advice you receive.

Certainly, we do encourage you to make good use of the Sonlight forums because there is so much good advice available. But, equally, remember that you really are the one who can make the very best educational decisions for your child.